Letter to Self: Bhumija Lenka, MBA
I often get lost in the havoc of life, in between the
responsibilities and dreams. I have waited patiently for every New Year’s Eve,
to make a resolution to accept myself, my flaws, my strengths, my experiences.
My experiences that include my past, lost opportunities, failures, the lost friendships and successes. Those little moments of joy
that are etched in my memory.
I often get lost in people and fulfilling their expectations, of being kind to them and not-so-kind sometimes, in between dreams and sacrifices. I have patiently worked on myself to reach a stage where I can understand why it is important to hold yourself well through every challenge that life throws at you. I have waited patiently for the past few years to accept that life can be unfair. That there will be ups and downs. And here I am, fighting my way through life.
Today, I read Amjad Islam Amjad’s poetry:
Kahan Aa K Rukne The Raste Kahan Mor Tha Use Bhul Ja
Vo Jo Mil Gaya Use Yad Rakh Jo Nahi Mila Use Bhul Ja
…and I realize that it is important to focus on the present; dwelling
in past leads to a path of uncertainty. Most importantly trust the process of
Learn why it is necessary to be brave enough to forgive and love yourself before others. To appreciate the people who come along and take that one extra step towards you. Today, I tell the twenty-three-year-old me that it’s okay to not rush into making a commitment. It’s okay to be the woman that I am becoming, even though people call me ‘too much’ at times. It’s okay to breakdown, things take time, and this shall pass too. It’s okay when the memories weigh you down, it is okay to wrap yourself up in sadness and stay away from the world and get lost in your own. It is okay to sit, cry, and be vulnerable. It’s okay to make choices, to choose yourself over people, to choose your dreams over them. And at times when you do not understand what exactly the hurricane inside you about is, just let it be. Go with the flow, breathe, and let it pass.
It is okay to question the existence of self, the purpose of life, but do not forget that nothing can stop you from climbing that mountain of success or from becoming the amazing person you wish to be.
Ms. Bhumija Lenka, MBA II